My Awful (?) Mum

Disclaimer: I may not have included all of the factors, good and bad, of my mum. I kinda want to upgrade my computer and I could use another gigabyte of RAM space, so I’m trying to get an ad deal. One should be enough.

My mum sorta sux. So I wrote this blog post about it.

She…

Lost my phone for me (IT HAD A COLOUR SCREEN!).
Has hijacked my netbook cause hers has a shoddy trackpad.
Is not letting me watch movies on my computer.
Made me do this stupid blog post (at least she didn’t object to the theme of the post…).
Generally does not let me talk about the crazy lady whereas she feels free to b@t*h about her all she wants.
Is now forcing me to do an essay after this. GAAAAAAAAAAHHHHHHH!!
Still owes me a considerable allowance.

However, I guess there is a somewhat larger nice side of my mum. Besides which this post has to reach 300 words to count.

For starters, unlike some people, she does not sell naked pics of me over the web. And she…

Allows us to go over-budget a lot. And I mean a LOT.
Eventually pays my allowance. Eventually. And she does allow me to have soft drinks.
Knows when I’m angry (never) and when I’m simply dehydrated (a lot of the time this is the cause).
Does not have very strict rules about beddy byes. Not when she has internet, anyway. Lol.
Is usually a bit more reasonable when it comes to computers. I mean, it is mine, not hers. I mean, she didn’t ask me about it… Should I even put this in the pros section? Is this a pro or a con? Oh to hell with it. Pro it is.

Alrighty then. I’m sweating my ass off in the heat of Penang, and so I leave you now to do something that is hopefully more interesting. Bye now!

Tags: Budget, Complaining, Essay, Forced, Mum

Uncategorized | smartass300 | August 19, 2011 3:48 AM

24 Comments

By Theodora, August 19, 2011 @ 4:02 AM

Well, I’m glad you included some pros. Frankly surprised that “forces me to do long jungle hikes were not included”…
By Nancy Sathre-Vogel (@familyonbikes), August 19, 2011 @ 4:04 AM

Brilliant! I think all moms are like that. We’re wonderful and horrible all mixed up together!
By Barbara in Singapore, August 19, 2011 @ 4:18 AM

Didn’t your Mum also stand on your new sunglasses? Mentioning that might have put you over your word limit though.
Any reason why you went with the American spelling of “arse”? Or did you mean a donkey?
By Theodora, August 19, 2011 @ 4:30 AM

I’m glad, at least, you found the space to include some pros. Surprised you didn’t find time to complain about brutal jungle treks, mountain climbs and motorbike catastrophes. Maybe in a follow-up post?
By Granny, August 19, 2011 @ 9:03 AM

A pretty liberal mum, I guess!
By akismet-99b6530af9ae2615076f5c672e2a1072, August 19, 2011 @ 9:39 AM

Well said, I’d say! A man of his own mind!
By disser420ary, August 19, 2011 @ 2:47 PM

I frieking love this! You rock and so does your mom for allowing this, hopefully we will meet on the road soon!
By wandering educators, August 19, 2011 @ 3:23 PM

i think your mom is pretty liberal, too! how lucky you are. think of the alternatives (shudder). good luck w/the ads! you can do it!!
By Colin Burns, August 20, 2011 @ 6:08 AM

I had a very good laugh at this… I hope Hayley and Noah end up with the same sense of humour

Cheers,
Colin
By Helen, August 20, 2011 @ 8:36 AM

Its a hard life, being ten
By Theodora, August 20, 2011 @ 11:07 AM

Strange. All my comments seem to have been permanently held for moderation.
By Jenn Miller, August 20, 2011 @ 12:58 PM

HA!! Awesome. Like your Mum, I also suck, in all the same ways!! My four kids would agree! I hope very much that we cross paths one day, you’d get on great with my boys! Nice post, even though you hated doing it!
By Talon (@1Dad1Kid), August 20, 2011 @ 1:19 PM

Let us know if you have luck with getting an ad!
By manonthelam.com (@manonthelam1), August 21, 2011 @ 5:09 PM

You’re 10 and you had a phone?
By Jane Reid (now Fearn), August 21, 2011 @ 5:38 PM

Have to say I like her style…
By Claire, August 22, 2011 @ 1:15 PM

Dear Ten Year Old / Smartass,

I love your hilarious posts! Keep posting – you have a new fan!
By Lisa Wood, August 22, 2011 @ 2:21 PM

Ummm – gosh I am glad my boys arent allowed here a computer to do a blog post about me! I almost fell off the chair while I was reading it…especially about the word limit, and the essay!! Love how awful your mum is…I would so be up there with the same rules about computer/dvds!!!

Thanks for sharing
Cheers
Lisa
By Amy, August 23, 2011 @ 10:26 AM

So funny. I think you would get along rather well with my 10 year old, though he would have similar complaints. Just be glad you are an only child – my son just had tutoring his sister in multiplication added to his school tasks.
By Lainie liberti, August 24, 2011 @ 12:39 AM

Uh, Miro, is that you? Did MY son write this?
By Marilia, August 24, 2011 @ 2:38 PM

You didn´t mention what kind of movies you want to watch.
By smartass300, September 15, 2011 @ 1:36 PM

I was nine back then.
By smartass300, September 15, 2011 @ 1:37 PM

Mum glued a donkey onto my arse.
By Theodora, September 15, 2011 @ 2:46 PM

*snorts*
By Shankar, November 8, 2011 @ 2:43 PM

I haven’t seen you or your mom! Bloody hell, I just came to know about your site through LP and I am already feeling as if I know you for years!

Great blog. Great duo of mom and son! All the best.

Cheers!